5 Ways You Block Your Feeling of Worthiness
Let's start, right up front, with the fact that you are already worthy.
By definition, worthiness is the feeling that you're good enough. Right now. Today. All the Time.
You don't need someone to declare your worthiness, you don't have to prove your worthiness - it's inherent. You were born worthy - and will stay worthy for eternity. You deserve all the good things and you're MORE than good enough.
The world has trained us to believe that worthiness must be earned. Not only is that bullshit, it stunts our growth. We block our feelings of worthiness which makes us feel . . . wait for it . . . unworthy. Do any of these blocks sound like you?
You think worthiness must be attained. You'll feel worthy once your boss recognizes how great you are, or when you get the six-figure salary you deserve, or when you meet the love of your life and settle into married bliss. Worthiness isn't a degree. It isn't an accolade. If you wait for an external event to render you worthy, it will never happen.
You equate worthiness with perfection. Striving for perfection (impossible, BTW) is often a gauge for worthiness. Once everything is perfect, then you'll feel worthy. But the catch is, you never reach that stage of perfection. There's always something else (or someone else) you need to fix - which pushes your worthiness farther away.
You're waiting for someone to proclaim you worthy. If you're waiting for your mother or father or parakeet or significant other to deem you worthy, you'd better prepare for a long wait. The only person in your life who can declare you worthy is yourself. (And me. I totally declare you worthy.)
Worthiness must be proven. Even if you think you've done everything "right" (whatever that means), there's still an empty place where you feel you have to prove yourself. So you do more. Then you do more. And still more - until you're exhausted and discouraged.
You believe worthiness equals value. Surrounding yourself with popular people, splurging on expensive vacations, buying into the latest trends and fashions to prove your worth is a losing game. Working 60 hours a week, putting your needs last, or spending your life pleasing others only takes time for your life. You can't create enough value to feel worthy if you don't already believe you're worthy.
If there's one thing I tell my clients, over and over, it's that they already ARE enough, they're already GOOD enough, they already DO enough. Your worth was assured long before you showed up on this planet, and it will continue long after you're gone. Don't let your thoughts destroy your peace of mind. Give yourself permission to feel worthy. Today. Right now.
Peri Kinder is a Certified Life Coach, Certified Yoga Teacher, Meditation Instructor and Humor Columnist.